Healthy Conversations are Essential for a wonderful life
Yes. You never thought so.? No one can ever confess that there were very good at calling out conversations. While growing up, we realized that our conversation skills need to get better or social skills. Sometimes the best place to start is to observe some of our “social heroes” in my life. People who talk to everyone who always has something to tell, never falling silent and no awkwardness.
But in most case there is two common problems:
- We don’t know where and what to talk to strangers about;
- It is very difficult to strike up a conversation when you have doubt or any thing interest or ‘real content’.
Most often, when we talked to someone, for example, a passerby at the bus stop, it quickly went out of silence. Awkward!
But gradually we began to learn from the small talk experts. We not only discovered that simple convo- talking about cats and calves – is easier than we had thought. It is also safe to say that we discovered that those types can be really fun. It helped us to build new relationships, and in everyday life, it simply helps us to enjoy days better.
But with enough tips and practice, you can become a person who regularly talks and one that is good at it. This will be noticeable when as soon as you hear someone saying something you can easily start a conversation.
Chests and calves – small talk – as social glue
Let us start by saying what we are talking about. The art of “cows and calves” is the ability to connect with all the people around you. You can use this type of conversation to get to know new people, to improve your existing relationships, to bring more coziness in your day (and those of others) and to enrich yourself and learn from the people around you.
If you make yourself aware that these kinds of conversations are useless, you will be short of yourself. They are extremely useful. It’s the glue that keeps your social network together. You do not come in with people to immediately start over their most vulnerable opinions, feelings and experiences. You use fun, airy conversations to strengthen the band, build mutual trust, find common interests and get closer together.
29 Tips On How To Have Great Conversation
Okay, sounds good. Time for tips. These are the tips I’ve used and worked best.
- Give your conversation partner the highest priority. Good social contacts develop when you live here and now. Bring yourself to the moment by focusing on your breathing, for example, by rubbing your fingers and focusing on this feeling.
- People immediately see you in your eyes if you are distracted. And that reduces the sense of contact and connectivity. Keep your head fully with your conversation partner, and apologize if you have to do something else (such as recording a phone).
- There are few people who have full attention to others. As soon as you can bring this, you immediately give people a nice feeling.
- Okay, and what should you say? First of all: relationships are built up by common factors. The more common factors you can find (and address), the closer you get to contact.
- The most obvious common factor is the weather. That’s why it’s such a popular topic. It works, but it is a bit cut off. But good, sometimes you have nothing better. Then the weather is a good starting point. Nicely light.
- Other common factors: A common friend (“What do you know Piet from?”), A common problem (“Is the WiFi so bad at you?”), A common location (“What’s nicely refurbished here?”) , a common interest (“Hey, how nice, that book I’ve read!”) etc.
- Do not enter the conversation to talk. Go to get to know the other.
- It’s the art of talking to the kid. Zéker if you do not know what to talk about.
- That means that you do not come to your story. It means you show interest. And that’s really simple.
- Interesting interest means asking questions (see tip 6 for a few examples) and showing genuine interest in the answers.
- By asking questions, talk to others. People find it very special to talk, especially about themselves. That also applies to me. But I’ve learned that people rather listen to themselves than to me. And that’s fine, because I’ve also learned that listening is much more interesting than talking. You put a lot more on it and you make more friends.
- So do not leave closed questions, because people are soon excited. Ask open questions. “What do you actually do in daily life?” “Oh ICT, interesting. Then you’re really busy with security for the NSA scandal? “
- Keep asking, before you know, you have a nice conversation and learn to know the other part by bit.
- Do not make an interview of. Of course, you are also supposed to contribute to the conversation yourself. But give the other the lead. Let the other decide what your input will be in the conversation. If anyone likes to talk, let them talk well and listen.
- Many conversations are not conversations. There are two people who both wait for their turn to talk. They do not listen or hardly, but constantly inject their own experiences and opinions in the conversation. Do not do that. I have people in my environment who do that constantly, and that’s shaking a lot.
- When I say, “I went to the vet with my dog this morning,” it is logical that the other asks something like: “Oh, what for?” For some people, however, you get a comment like: “Yes, I also last week, was another story because … blablabla.” And then the conversation about the other’s dog. If that happens then you know that the other is not interested in your life. If that happens constantly, you will discover that the person does not fit with you. Do not be such a person.
- Make a habit of imagining yourself. It’s a dead man to swing around at a party. “Hello everyone, I congratulate you! Congratulations!” It’s easy, but it’s a lot more difficult to get started with fun conversations. Especially because everyone directly feels that you are not a social person. Just go around, imagine yourself and do the best to remember the names.
- Can you talk and get a third person you do not know? Then interrupt the conversation: “Sorry, but we have not noticed yet, hai, I’m Piet.” Do not imagine yourself is almost always more awkward than you imagine. Even if the situation is uncomfortable. Introducing yourself to others is always a good starting point.
- Look the other in the eyes while giving a hand. If you find it difficult to give a good hand, exercise coordination rather than a good friend. Explain that you want to improve your first impression and want to practice exercising with hands shaking. Just give each other a hand and notice how it’s getting better.
- Realize that you will make mistakes. That there will be uncomfortable situations. That you will be taken a couple of times. That belongs to that. But do not worry, people forget quickly. And, if you want, you can even enjoy it.
- Do not take yourself too seriously. Laugh yourself if you’re doing something or saying, and just be honest. If you say something strange, just explain how this came about: “Oh, oh, sorry! What kind of say haha! I thought so because you drank alcohol-free wine. Now it seems like I think you’re fat! But you have to drive, where do you live? “
- Remembering names is very important. If someone proposes, listen carefully to the name. If you could not understand the name, just ask: “Sorry, what was your name?” Then repeat the name a few times in your mind. Have you forgotten someone’s name later? Just ask for a second and explain that you are having difficulty remembering names. Nothing wrong.
- Being honest and open works best. Do not try to do better than you are. Just be yourself. People are happy to talk to real people. They are really welcome to contact. If you happen to be different than you are, people are watching it quickly and lose their interest.
- Being honest and open means also vulnerable. Because if you really show who you are, and people do not like what they see, it means they do not like you. That can feel painful. But realize that people usually find you more fun when you are yourself, and realize that not everybody has to be your friend. The more you repel certain people, the more likely you are attracting other people more strongly.
- Let go of your ego. That sounds easier than it is, but it is important. Do not constantly try to get you right. Do not try other people to read the lesson. Do not try to make a discussion anywhere. You strengthen the band if you find common factors. By putting down on others, you worsen the band in many cases. Do not you agree on a topic? Prima, move on to another topic to restore the common feeling.
- Move in the conversation from airiness to more depth. A conversation begins with facts. The weather, your job, finding a parking space, the place where you are, etc. Then you can move on to opinions (scanning where the other is), and then you can move on to feelings. This is sometimes easier than other times. It is the level of feelings that you pass the ego over and really create a meaningful connection. It’s also the most vulnerable part of one’s life, so you will not come here until you trust each other.
- You build trust by being self-open about your own opinions and feelings. When you open the door, the other will be more likely to do that. But do not suddenly open all the valves that push people off. Open yourself step by step, piece by bit, and let the other do the same. Before you know, you are building a beautiful band together.
- Explain yourself to social situations regularly. Practice as often as you can. Start small, build your skills and confidence slowly, and notice how to get better when making conversations.
- Know that most people like to have more contact with the people around them. This is true for your friends, for your relatives, and for strangers in the street. Everyone is happy with a smile, a happy good morning, a cozy conversation. Everyone likes it as another sincere interest in your shows. That makes you feel special that you are valuable. And it’s great if you can give others this feeling. And the more you deal with people, the stronger you begin to realize that it is also true. Everyone is special, everyone is valuable. And everyone is worth being loved.
Airy conversations are incredibly valuable. It’s always the beginning of something beautiful, and the better you get in touch, the more magic will get your life. You find people who are right with you, you get acquainted with new ideas, you are having more fun with people and you have a stronger social safety net.
I hope these tips inspire you to engage more frequent conversations with the people in your life. Do you have additional tips that others can help? Be sure to leave them behind in a comment!