NLP Presuppositions – NLP has a number of assumptions, ie starting points. You can see them best as a number of basic principles that you automatically apply and respect when you are working with NLP. What are these NLP assumptions? You can find them in this article.
1. Every behavior was the best choice someone had at that time
With the wisdom of today, you would often have done something different in the past. But that makes sense, because you have acquired that wisdom by doing it and making ‘mistakes’. Another way to set this NLP principle is: everyone does his best with the tools that he or she has available at that moment. This also has to do with the following premise about the positive intention …
2. Behind every Behavior, there is a positive intention
The positive intention, also known as ‘secondary gain’, is one of the most important components of a problem. Let’s start with an example: someone can smoke because he/she has the positive intention to have a social moment with a friend who also smokes at the same time. Another example: scolding seems incomprehensible on the surface. The positive intent of this BEHAVIOR could be to feel or be connected.
Instead of accusing someone, you ask, “What does someone want to achieve with this behavior? What value (s) does this person fulfill? ‘
What can you do with this knowledge? NLP uses this to find a new application for the positive intention. This person could, therefore, come up with new options that can fulfill the intention of being ‘social’, in which he/she does not have to smoke.
Sometimes someone does not want to get rid of the drama. He is a bit attached to it. Let this person know that similar benefits can be obtained with different behavior!
This is one of the most important references (thinking around). In addition, we look at the intention in the logical levels. We also process the positive intention in giving feedback. Finally, you can apply this not only to internal conflicts but also to external conflicts (mediation and negotiation). Working with intentions is therefore something that an NLP does a lot.
You often have a feeling of unrest … How handsome! What is the intention of this?
You will have done your best!
I want you to get through that feeling of unrest (This is a shocking phrase so far, so stop and calibrate for trance signals) … Until we find other ways for your positive intent.
It is your job (the task of the client) to test different (NLP) interventions to reframe the positive intention.
3. Failure does not exist. Only feedback exists
Each result is an experience that you can refer to, and thus gives you valuable information for the next time. Make mistakes and enjoy. If you do not make mistakes, the challenges you are working on are not challenging enough. And that is a big mistake. If we continue this principle further, we arrive at non-duality: failure = success.
The principle ‘Failure does not exist, only feedback exists’ also has to do with the following principle (The meaning of your communication is the called response). If you do not achieve what you want, you have to change something in your approach.
4. The meaning of the message is the reaction that follows
In other words: the meaning of your communication is the response you get. So you measure whether you have communicated well, by seeing if the message has passed through correctly to the other party, and you are responsible for a correct transfer. If the other party has misunderstood it, while you have explained it so perfectly according to yourself, then you still do not put the blame on the other person, but on the communication method, you had chosen (and you will test something else next time). , see the following principle).
5. If what you are doing does not work, test something else
This is the TOTE idea (Test Operate Test Exit). You always test (for example by asking if something has worked), and if it does not have the desired result, you test something else again. This implies an attitude of curiosity and the willingness to experiment!
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always had.
– Tony Robbins
Test something new. For example, this principle is used in hypnosis: if you calibrate that the client responds very well to certain hypnotic suggestions, and less strongly to other suggestions, use the suggestions that worked very well extra often!
6. The one with the most flexibility wins: live with options!
People with great flexibility have the most opportunities to get the result they want. This has to do with the previous assumption of NLP (If what you are doing does not work, test something else). The people who come the furthest in life are people who have options, and know that they always have options, for example about how to respond.
Always retain freedom of option, such as having a choice in how you feel. That is flexibility. Proactive people live with options. Communicate this way of life to your clients, students and children. For example, give your child three of all. This is how the subconscious learns: I have a choice. If you have done some shopping, put three types of fruit on the table. If you buy teats for your child, buy three and let the child know that it always has choices.
7. The map is not the area & Perception is projection
The way in which we make a model of the world of the world is only a reference to reality. It is not reality itself. How we ‘represent’ the world is only our own interpretation. It is our view of reality, and we act and think about it. The words we use are not the same as the event or object they represent. The tragedy is that if everyone would observe this simple principle, there would have been no (religious) violence.
People were killed before: putting the truth into words. If you believe that only your own model of the world is the truth, you use it through the ego. You are the truth. Do not look for it outside of you. Connect with it. Then all your actions and relationships will reflect the unity with all the life you experience deep inside. That is love.
What you say is true. And the joke is: what he says is also true. It is not a singular truth, but a multiple truth.
What can you do with this information? Then you can extend this idea: our model of the world has more influence on the real world than you think. If you understand this, you are on the cause-side (proactive).
8. Respect the model (map/representation of the world of the other)
Your view is your reality. That applies to everyone. Park your prejudices and deepen yourself in the world model of the other. Your world model is never the truth: it is always different from reality.
I have the world model. That’s right, and you must agree with it.
9. You can not communicate/manipulate
People have two levels of communication: a conscious and an unconscious level. Even if you do not say anything, your body will tell you something. Now a new question arises: in which direction will you manipulate? For a better world or for a worse world? The joke is that sooner or later the latter option will turn out bad for everyone.
“Do not try to come too late this time.”
“That’s very capable use of the milton model in the wrong direction.”
10. Everyone already has all the tools needed to achieve the desired results (if someone else can do it, I can do it too!)
The subconscious mind is so intelligent and has all the information in it. For example, you had already demonstrated the skills in a different context, and you had not yet thought about using it in a different context.
Modeling successful actions leads to excellence.
This premise is diametrically opposed to the ‘Dutch’ statement: ‘You have it or you do not have it.’ If you adhere to this statement, it leads to putting yourself down to the current situation. Adopting the NLP presupposition leads to a healthy attitude of experimentation and interest in the behavior and abilities of another.
NLP is an attitude based on curiosity
– Richard Bandler
11. There are no incapacitated people, only incapacitated states (mood/moods)
With the right mood (and action) you can get far. In addition: someone’s behavior is not who the person is. Accept the person, not necessarily the behavior
12. Resistance to a discussion partner is a sign of lack of report and flexibility
‘Resistance’ is a sign of a lack of report.
With report everything is possible, without a report nothing is possible.
There are no clients with resistance, there are only inflexible communicators. Effective communicators accept and use all communication they receive. This is called utilization, which is perfect when dealing with ‘resistance’.
In addition, the following principle about context and ecology says a lot about resistance …
13. Behavior and change should be evaluated in their context and ecology
If we want to change behavior, we always check the ecology. Resistance to a client is a sign of a lack of ecology. Fits what you do or do late, with the standards and values of the coachee? Is that what he or she wants? The first and most powerful step to change (read: new options) is to want it. Ecology also means: is this okay for other areas and other people in my life?
By using the feedback, we can ensure that we do not confuse someone’s behavior with someone’s skills or identity.
People are not their behavior: accept the person, change the behavior.
14. The body is the spirit
This may mean that if you have a fit body, you automatically have a fit mind. This principle can also mean that the body gives the answers directly. For example, the body can indicate someone ‘s timeline by leaning, turning or gesturing (with a certain hand), in a certain direction. So calibrate on behavior/body. That gives the most valuable information.
If you are talking to someone, then know that the words are only a small part of the communication. More important is the feeling: read between the lines, focus on unconscious signals in someone’s use of voice and body language. This is also the following principle: work with structure, not with content.
15. Work with structure, not with content
The content is as it is. You can not change anything that has happened to it. You can, however, influence how you deal with it: the structure of your experience. NLP takes place at that level.
- What is being said.
- What happened.
- What is seen, heard or felt (in a representation).
- How it is said.
- How it is experienced.
- The submodalities of a representation.
16. The past is not equal to the future
This premise is mentioned here last, but it is at least as important as all other assumptions: the past is not equal to the future.
We are always new.
Something that had a certain use in the past is often no longer useful in new situations. Yet it sometimes happens that people ‘generalize’ past behavior or convictions into the future. It’s not necessary. In every new situation, you have the option to do something different from what you have done in the past. See your client as already healed.
Nobody is broken.
The extensive set of presuppositions from NLP (Leestip)
Did you find the 16 presuppositions of this article a lot because you often find 11 presuppositions in other sources? Then browse the book ‘Essences of NLP’. In it, there are 19. Do you not have this book yet? Then it is nice to have this well-founded book in your possession.
Exercise – View problem or restrictive thought from the NLP assumptions
Put the NLP assumptions as cards on the ground, and always use your theme on each card. In this way you always view your theme from the framework of one of the NLP principles. Mark all new perspectives ( reframing ) that arise from this, and share them with each other. If you have little time, you can use your 3 favorite presuppositions.
Conduct a discussion about a particular starting point of NLP. Two people defend the starting point and two people attack it. Pay attention to (the lack of) specific information: ask for examples and question. Do this at least once with someone who does not do NLP training.
Exercise: discussion in the wild
Discuss with someone who has not done anything with NLP about one of the presuppositions of NLP.
Exercise: what is your positive intention?
Choose a behavior of yourself that you are not satisfied with. Find out for yourself what the positive intent of that behavior could be.
Exercise: what is the positive intention of the other person?
- Take the behavior of another person that you are struggling with.
- Determine what the positive intention of the other could be.
- Determine how you could respond to that positive intention, so that you improve communication with this person.
- Determine whether or not you want to carry out your intended action.
Exercise: coaching someone according to his positive intention
Have a conversation with someone (who does not do NLP). You discuss the behavior of the other person he is not satisfied with and that he wants to change while it is not yet successful. Finds him what the positive intention of that behavior could be. It is important that the other person finds the answer himself: you have a coaching role.
What is your vision about these basic principles of NLP? Or choose one and write about it in the comments.